Being Nostalgic

Time seems to have rolled on much too fast. It feels as if yesterday that I have lived my most cherished moments. Everyday I wake up to the so called new day and every night I sleep out waiting for the next day. Still this yesterday doesn’t look like passing away ever and ever atleast for once! Every morning I wake up telling myself “Yesterday is gone all that I have is today and I have to think of a better tomorrow” and how much do I succeed?? Yes for two, three or four days but then again one day at some point of time I my today, my mind my thoughts take me back to yesterday. And then the usual chain of happenings, those reminiscences of happy times, of sad ones, of victory, of failures, of silly fights, of stupid quarrels, and of times of extreme support from friends even at silly crazy ideas,… all start right from the day I started remembering events, its not that I have remembered all that has happened so far, nobody has, can or will remember that way but still there are some that never have gone from my mind, there are memories again which I would like to forget and never remember ever again!!
Sometimes I wonder what it, of which human memory is made up, is and how the most complex circuitry that of our brain records and stores those that we call memories, it sure isn’t some rewritable media or atleast a formattable disk, but it sure has an unimaginable storage capacity and the best thing is the way of retrieval. I suppose it’s a common thing for all of us isn’t it, to just sit down silent and lonely and start thinking about memories and the things we remember are each crystal clear to us as if they had occurred yesterday!! Oh God not again!! Why does this yesterday thing become so important in our life?
They say today is a gift, to utilize wisely for a better tomorrow. Each moment is precious, we often get cornered not to fool around and waste time. But in this hectic schedule, where life has become so monotonically defined that people wake up and start their daily chores in a pace that is always the same in general like waking up at a particular time, brushing teeth and continuing till you get ready to leave for your workplace and the next moment you look at your watch you realize time has indeed passed away fast! Sometimes we didn’t even have time to spare for taking a walk in serene surroundings enjoying the cool morning air or atleast rejoicing at the chirping birds! And this way today passes and soon at the end of the day becomes yesterday! All that we have when we go to sleep is again some memories of today that will soon while we sleep tonight become memories of yesterday when we wake up tomorrow!! Likewise the cycle of yesterday-today-tomorrow continues forever.
It is funny, the way we describe someone who lives in yesterday as being nostalgic and someone who keeps on pushing off things that one otherwise should have started today to start tomorrow as a procrastinator. No one can say that he/she hasn’t ever have had a row of nostalgia at any point of time.
When I look around myself be it in my friend circle, at our surrounding neighbors or for that matter the everyday society I come across I find a lot of nostalgics like me and procrastinators too but only a rare handful of people who live in the present. And mind you in no way does it mean that we, being nostalgics always remain in the past! All that I try to do is fill my today with so many memorable little things before it becomes yesterday, so that the next time I become nostalgic, I wont be sad.
I am but only one among the lot others who love the feeling of being nostalgic although sometimes I do become a procrastinator for a few days when matters like studying for the exams or sticking to a scheduled regimen show up; but yet again I am not the only one who procrastinates such matters!
Good or bad I know not, but I am happy trying to make the most of my today and enjoying the moments of being nostalgic thinking about my school, college and hostel life…….

Lost In Myself

Tonight on the terrace I stood
I tried to look as far into the roads I possibly could.
The full moon over my head beamed,
Of a fairy,standing there I dreamed!
Your thoughts came to me
I looked at the moon
A golden brightness surrounded her soon
Alone in the lonely sky she shone
Then came the stars one by one
Oh what a glorious sight that was!
Time seemed to come to a standstill.
Then suddenly an emptiness swelled inside me
An emptiness of you not being with me
When I was devouring this sight
An emptiness I knew I alone could not fight
An emptiness I know,no one but you can fill
There is one thing I need to be clear
There is only one thing I fear
An answer I have so longed to hear
When I remember you closing my eyes
Will I find you near?
My road to you as my destination
Seems to me all uphill
Do I need to tell you everything in detail still!??

Remembering You On Your Birthday

Today when I thought of you,I got no other day
As special as this to say a thank you!
I remember the day you once told me
I am still a child!
Few years had passed then,Few years have passed now
But wait! For you must hear I am not a child anymore.....
Now when I look back to where had it all started?
The beginning,the progress,the end all seems silly to me.
Cos I was still a child then,But am not one anymore!
The times I spent with my friends I will always remember
Those moments happy and sad at school,I will cherish forever
Cos I was still a child then,But am not anymore!
Being a friend of mine,you have always taught
One thing now that I have never forgot!
To live my life as it comes my way
To stop worrying myself out night and day.
My life has moved on,as have you
Cos I was still a child then,But am not anymore!
All that I want is to wish today
May this day be a very memorable,blessed and happy birthday!!!
P.S.This I will always remember
My life has for me lots more in store
I was still a child then,but am not anymore...not anymore.....

Her Boon Of Bliss

Slowly and silently they started to fall
Drop by drop as if answering a thirsty call
I was drawn into the majestic exhibition
Of heavenly beauty and eternal satisfaction
I started walking out of the door
I felt I was welcomed to the core!
For gradually the drops grew bigger
For gradually the roar was heavier!
Still I could not let go off that embrace
However hard I tried
My steps I could not retrace!
And far I went so far I went!
I was watching the water fill up every crack and vent
The water was dripping me wet
And the feeling was joyously wonderful I bet!
An aroma of freshness was in the air
The whole of Earth suddenly looked so green so fair
I realised with the advent of monsoon
The Earth had indeed recieved a unique boon!!

I Dont Know Why!!

This morning I woke Up at 5:00,not my usual time to rise up nowadays;It was a habit long compromised,since the day I left our college! But today as I opened my eyes,still half asleep I had the thoughts"BUS WILL ARRIVE AT 6:30 AT MY STOPPAGE,GOT TO GET THERE ASAP" or will miss another day of fun;With this in mind I immediately got back my senses,on looking around I found something that broke my heart,
NO! these surroundings aren't the ones I was used to while going to college;YES!! Indeed I was at the luxurious cozy enclosure of my sweet home and was still sitting on my bed! But suddenly I realised I was alone,lonely,neither the wake-up alarm tones from my roommates nor the usual "ABEY UTHUNU BEY COLLEGE JIBANIKI AJI" to tell to my bed partner! There was no one else in the room but me.I felt very uneasy at the happenings and then a train of memories flooded my brains,and with each of them I began to realise how much my college,my friends(and our teachers)too,the hostel life of 2 years at Patia and Vss Nagar each one of them meant to me.And I didn't want to stop those thoughts;
After all,these were priceless treasures exclusively mine,I will not say unique,because luckily there were lots of friends to share with,whether it be bunking class or escaping from college midday,be it naughtiness inside the class,or sleeping during lectures,be it teasing,be it playing pranks,or be it back stabbing teachers(Hey! we never tried this one ever)but we made fun of all of them hahahaha at their back of course!!!
I was hell yes enjoying my college days! I never thought I will write about my college,never thought that thinking of those days,those moments,those friends would ever stir me up this way! Someone has rightly said "It is always at the end of something that we realise how beautiful the beginning was!"And yes this I can in fact, all of us I know at my heart can stand up and proudly say "I have been the first batch of REC,I have seen its inception,the steady build up,the gradual change and beautifying surroundings;I have lived through four glorious years of my life being a part of REC that unfortunately will never ever come back again to be relived.Happy or sad,this is a bitter fact!!
MISS YOU ALL DEAR FRIENDS

A Greeting Not Long Before Being Forgotten

O my dearest friend!
I wish you were here with me now.
So that I could greet you on your birthday
But I moan and am sad to think you are not near me
Yet I hope there will be a time whenWe meet each other and find ourselves to ourselves very near So that both me and you can talk and simultaneously hear
About our past days and sweet memories
When we tried to our beautiful thoughts cherish!
But O my friend please dont forget as it is a fact very clear
That to a true friendship,there is really no end near......

My Thoughts!

If You Love Someone Madly & Some Other One Loves You Madly,Who Would You Choose?
Did it ring a bell?It sure did for me when one evening my cousin asked me this question conditioning my answer should not hurt anybody!!!!
And this is all I could say:
Love is all about giving and not expecting the return.So definitely in the first place it seems that the person you love madly matters the most to you,but yet again in this matter expressions are not to be neglected.It is said that thoughts and feelings remain forever as such unless converted into words and expressed rightly.It is here that the person who loves you madly comes into the picture.There are innumerable examples that prove true love has stayed incomplete due to lack of expressions!
Hence even if you know that the person loves you madly, it is the expression of her love that is most important both for you and for her.It is important for her because she will feel confident that she had let her feelings out to her beloved and it will matter to you because you have got to convince her optimistically and let the truth dawn upon her that you are in love with another person politely so that she does not go on to do something that is not expected of her!
You have to make her believe that love is all but to give give and give.You got to confide her that the truth is that the world is as it is because it stands on hope,faith and trust among people and that the person who loves you madly will remain as good a friend as trustworthy and caring like no oher in your life and no matter how fortunate you will be in your pursuit of love,that the person who loves you madly will remain a friend to you and you will always be there for her as a friend to fall back upon in times of despair.
Hence both are equally important in their own places and to say who is more important to choose is like asking the fiery sea as who matters to you the most-The innumerable tiny rivers that as friends make you who you are!or The shores and the beach which bear your continuous hamering with unruly waves like a patient observer and yet loving you more and more with your every blow!!